The Attack Goat, Part II
Billy the attack goat is really starting to make me mad. Please know, those aren't my exact thoughts, but that's what I'm writing because this blog is rated G.
To fully understand this entry, you must read my previous note.
Billy (i have no idea why this is now bold print) is safe, secure and very comfortable tonight. Meantime, I'm barely back at the ranch.
We're getting some much needed rain today. In fact, it's been raining since sunrise. It's the slow, steady type. I can almost hear the plant life sighing with relief.
But back to Billy.. I went to feed & water him today. Keep in mind, I won't go near him without weapons of mass destruction.
I told the previous blog story to my friend, the goat's owner. He said, "just give him some hay @ the front of the trailer. He'll leave you alone."
Great advice. Good stuff. It could work.. if it weren't raining like the Amazon rain forest out here today. If you've ever lived in a region with loose soil I bet you know where I'm going.
I got the hay. No problem. Then, I drove my truck to Billy's trailer. I had no worries til' zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. That's the sound of my tires spinning in west Texas mud.
"Okay, no big deal. I have four wheel drive," I thought. Not so. I put my truck in 4x drive and nothing. I mean nothing! Mud was going everywhere. My rpm's were up around one million and I was sitting still.
Forward, reverse, forward, reverse... NOTHING!!! Dang goat, I yelled. Then, I remembered; I have thumbs--he's a goat.
I tried another gear. That worked a little. I tried more forward, reverse, forward, reverse... finally, I felt some movement. I think I backed up 50-yards. Then, I drove out to the highway.
The "Readers' Digest" version is, I got free. I walked about 100-yds through mud while wearing flip flops to Billy's trailer.
Do you know that this goat, rared up @ me inside his trailer. I think he was saying, "you're late!!!"
Ah ha! I have hay! So, I slipped the hay through the slots @ the front of the trailer, thinking this will keep you dinner on four legs busy for a few minutes.
Well, not so! He ate for as long as it took me to open the trailer to reach his water pale and food bucket. That's when he made a dash for the exit sign.
Fortunately for me, I grabbed the water pale and food bucket and slammed the gate. Kaboooom! Billy hit the gate full force.
By this time, I'm cussin' in a foreign language. It's raining. I'm soaked. My feet are covered in mud. And like salt on a wound, I have this maniac Billy that's really upset that I'm late with supper.
Long story short is, I shooed him away from the gate long enough to slip in his
water and food buckets.
I left him eating and drinking like a single guy at happy hour. Meantime, I tredged back through the mud, in my flip flops, to my truck on the highway.
Again, Billy doesn't speak spanish. Can you say cabrito!!
Bill Robertson
Mgr., Windmill Ranch Preserve
325.573.1200
To fully understand this entry, you must read my previous note.
Billy (i have no idea why this is now bold print) is safe, secure and very comfortable tonight. Meantime, I'm barely back at the ranch.
We're getting some much needed rain today. In fact, it's been raining since sunrise. It's the slow, steady type. I can almost hear the plant life sighing with relief.
But back to Billy.. I went to feed & water him today. Keep in mind, I won't go near him without weapons of mass destruction.
I told the previous blog story to my friend, the goat's owner. He said, "just give him some hay @ the front of the trailer. He'll leave you alone."
Great advice. Good stuff. It could work.. if it weren't raining like the Amazon rain forest out here today. If you've ever lived in a region with loose soil I bet you know where I'm going.
I got the hay. No problem. Then, I drove my truck to Billy's trailer. I had no worries til' zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. That's the sound of my tires spinning in west Texas mud.
"Okay, no big deal. I have four wheel drive," I thought. Not so. I put my truck in 4x drive and nothing. I mean nothing! Mud was going everywhere. My rpm's were up around one million and I was sitting still.
Forward, reverse, forward, reverse... NOTHING!!! Dang goat, I yelled. Then, I remembered; I have thumbs--he's a goat.
I tried another gear. That worked a little. I tried more forward, reverse, forward, reverse... finally, I felt some movement. I think I backed up 50-yards. Then, I drove out to the highway.
The "Readers' Digest" version is, I got free. I walked about 100-yds through mud while wearing flip flops to Billy's trailer.
Do you know that this goat, rared up @ me inside his trailer. I think he was saying, "you're late!!!"
Ah ha! I have hay! So, I slipped the hay through the slots @ the front of the trailer, thinking this will keep you dinner on four legs busy for a few minutes.
Well, not so! He ate for as long as it took me to open the trailer to reach his water pale and food bucket. That's when he made a dash for the exit sign.
Fortunately for me, I grabbed the water pale and food bucket and slammed the gate. Kaboooom! Billy hit the gate full force.
By this time, I'm cussin' in a foreign language. It's raining. I'm soaked. My feet are covered in mud. And like salt on a wound, I have this maniac Billy that's really upset that I'm late with supper.
Long story short is, I shooed him away from the gate long enough to slip in his
water and food buckets.
I left him eating and drinking like a single guy at happy hour. Meantime, I tredged back through the mud, in my flip flops, to my truck on the highway.
Again, Billy doesn't speak spanish. Can you say cabrito!!
Bill Robertson
Mgr., Windmill Ranch Preserve
325.573.1200
posted by Windmill Ranch @ 5:09 PM
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